everything happens for a reason?
Simply put. Tonight I met a man who went to Oakes college in Santa Cruz. I have recently chosen to go to UCSC. I wondered for a while if it was the right choice. All of a sudden my ambition and grades are at stake. Can I, will I, do I, have I the willpower and passion? I have the passion, now have I the chance? The chance to push myself. I need to keep C’s, these last two classes I don’t even need for my transferrable units to UCSC, but I am freaking out because I did not do as hot as I could have on a midterm and now everything seems doubly harder. It will get harder too. At this time, belief in myself and my abilities, faith in myself and others, relaxation… and acceptance…. real. Real is what is needed, a must, so easy in retrospect. I want to prove to myself, and tonight meeting this man made me think of my past choices. I feel drained. He reminded me of a talking weapon, a sad, lost puppy but worse- a gnarly wolf with a stubbed foot. I felt like dreams could wither, but I wouldn’t let it. I will not let it, there is no other choice.
3 years ago